Depression Changed My Appetite: Why You Can't Eat (Or Can't Stop)

Changes in eating patterns are often one of the first signs that someone's mental health is declining. Yet there are plenty of advice about 'eating healthy' and self-care meals, but very little acknowledgment of what it is actually like when even opening the fridge feels overwhelming, or when food becomes your only source of comfort.

When I ask clients about their eating patterns during difficult periods, I frequently hear 2 variations of the same struggle: "I have no mood to eat, but I can't do it", or "I keep eating when I'm not even hungry, and I don't know why." These are not about lacking willpower (to stop) or not caring about health. It is how depression, anxiety and overwhelming stress affect our executive functioning, our emotional regulation, and our ability to meet our own needs.

Today, I want to share some insights about eating habits that I regularly discuss with clients, not because they are revolutionary or complicated, but precisely because they are not. Simple approaches that can work for you, making nourishment more accessible when mental health is suffering.

Keep Easily Accessible, No-Barrier Foods Within Reach

When clients are experiencing depression, burnout or overwhelming stress, even simple tasks can feel heavy. The thought of planning a meal, finding ingredients, cooking, and cleaning up afterward can be so overwhelming that skipping food entirely seems like the easier option.

One of the eating habits I consistently recommend is keeping easy, nutrient-rich foods visible and accessible. Notice I said visible, and this matters more than you might think. When we are struggling mentally, we often lack the cognitive energy to remember what food we have or to make decisions about what to eat. Having foods in plain sight reduces the mental load required.

Some practical suggestions:

• Small packets of nuts, seeds or trail mix placed in easy-to-see locations

• Whole-grain crackers or biscuits kept on the countertop

• Canned protein like tuna, salmon or beans that can be eaten straight from the can with minimal preparation

• Pre-cut vegetables or fruits in clear containers at eye level in the fridge

• Or even nutrition bars for times when even 'easy' food feels like too much

Is this perfect nutrition? No. This isn't ideal nutrition, but when depression has drained your energy, eating something instead of nothing helps to stabilise your blood sugar and keeps your brain working.

There is also something deeply compassionate about setting yourself up this way. When you have those practical, accessible food prepared, you are essentially taking care of your future self when you have the energy to do so.

Eat at Regular Times, Even When There's No Mood to Eat

Many clients with depression or anxiety skip meals because they don't feel hungry, no mood to eat or are too overwhelmed to think about food. Depression, in particular, can suppress appetite or make food feel completely unappetizing. Anxiety can tie our stomachs in knots, making eating feel uncomfortable or even anxiety-inducing itself.

Irregular eating patterns contribute to mood instability, increased irritability, brain fog, and worsened fatigue. When we skip meals, our blood sugar drops, which triggers the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones can intensify feelings of anxiety, make concentration more difficult, and leave us feeling shaky, irritable, or emotionally vulnerable.

And this can create a vicious cycle: depression makes it hard to eat → not eating makes mood and energy worse → worsening mood makes eating feel even more difficult.

The eating habit I will encourage is to set reminders to eat something at regular intervals throughout the day, even if it is something small, such as:

• Setting phone alarms for breakfast, lunch, and dinner times

• Pairing eating with another regular activity (like having a snack when you take medication or after a daily walk)

• Starting with just one anchor meal per day, if three feels overwhelming

• Committing to eating something, even if it is not a complete meal

What I find particularly important about this practice is that it is not just about nutrition. Feeding yourself regularly becomes tangible evidence that you are taking care of yourself and that you are capable of caring for yourself. During depression, when negative self-talk and feelings of helplessness are common, these small acts of self-care become evidence against the lies that depression tells us.

Each time you eat something even when you didn't feel like it, you are practicing agency. You are showing yourself that you can get through difficult periods, one meal at a time.

Emotional Eating, When Food Becomes Your Only Comfort

While some clients skip meals during difficult times, others experience the opposite pattern: eating when they are not physically hungry, continuing past fullness, or using food as a primary way to cope with uncomfortable emotions. This is what we call emotional eating, and it is another common way that mental health struggles show up in our relationship with food.

If you eat when you're not hungry or past the point of fullness, there is usually a reason beyond just the lack of self-control.

What Is Actually Happening with Emotional Eating

Emotional eating happens when we use food to meet psychological or emotional needs rather than physical hunger. When a person is experiencing depression, burnout, or overwhelming anxiety, their emotional landscape can become quite barren. Many people describe feeling numb, disconnected, or emotionally flat. In this state, food can become one of the few reliable sources of sensation, comfort, or even just feeling something.

When we are emotionally depleted or numb, our capacity for other forms of pleasure, connection and self-soothing becomes severely limited. Research has shown that when people are experiencing prolonged stress, they develop an intense focus on thoughts about food and eating activities, often experiencing depression and anxiety as consequences (Ioakimidis et al., 2011). Spending time with friends requires energy that we might not have, and hobbies we once enjoyed no longer bring the same satisfaction. Even positive experiences feel muted or unreachable.

But food? Food is concrete, immediate, and accessible. It does not require the emotional energy that social connection demands, and it provides quick sensory stimulation when everything else feels grey. For a few minutes while eating, there is taste, texture, and sensation, which is a brief break from the numbness or a momentary distraction from overwhelming emotions.

It's Not About the Food, It's About the Need

If you notice yourself eating past fullness, your body isn't asking for sustenance. Perhaps, something else is trying to be heard.

Interestingly, research found that people who identify as "emotional eaters" don't necessarily consume more food when experiencing negative emotions compared to those who don't identify this way (Bongers & Jansen, 2016). What emotional eating scores seem to reflect more accurately is how we think about the relationship between our emotions and eating, rather than our actual eating behaviour in emotional moments (Adriaanse et al., 2011).

Your system might be desperately trying to:

• Create any sensation or feeling when emotional numbness has made everything feel flat

• Find brief moments of pleasure when depression has stolen joy from other activities

• Exert control over something when other areas of life feel chaotic or overwhelming

• Self-soothe when anxiety is high and other calming strategies feel out of reach

• Fill an emotional void when connection with others feels too difficult or unavailable

Connection Between Emotional Eating and Not Eating Enough

Interestingly, emotional eating and undereating often co-exist or alternate within the same person during different phases of mental health struggles. Both patterns are responses to overwhelm, but expressed or manifest differently.

When you are not eating regularly (as discussed earlier), your blood sugar becomes unstable, your mood becomes more fragile, and your emotional regulation becomes even more difficult. This can actually trigger emotional eating episodes, you might skip meals all day due to low energy or lack of appetite, then find yourself intensely craving food in the evening, eating quickly and past fullness, often whilst feeling disconnected or numb.

Similarly, emotional eating episodes can be followed by periods of meal-skipping, either from guilt about eating or because the cycle has disrupted your natural hunger cues. This creates an unstable pattern where your body never quite knows when or how much food is coming, which makes both emotional regulation and natural hunger signals even more confused. Your automatic eating patterns, i.e. when and what you habitually eat, predict your eating behaviour more than whether you identify as an 'emotional eater' (Adriaanse et al., 2011).

What Does This Mean?

Rather than restriction or willpower, which typically backfire, more effective approaches include:

Recognize it as information. Emotional eating is your system signaling that something needs attention. What are you feeling (or trying not to feel) right before reaching for food? Stress? Loneliness? Boredom? Numbness? Anxiety? Simply noticing without judgment is the first step.

Address the underlying depletion. As you work on the depression, burnout, or anxiety that is driving the pattern, emotional eating often naturally decreases. When you have more emotional capacity and other sources of comfort or pleasure become accessible again, food no longer needs to serve those functions.

Build other coping tools gradually. You are not trying to eliminate emotional eating overnight. Instead, you are slowly expanding your options and coping tools. This can perhaps be taking a short walk or texting a friend when you feel lonely, or journaling when you are overwhelmed. And food can still be what you choose sometimes.

Work on regular eating patterns. Paradoxically, the same strategy I mentioned earlier, i.e. eating at regular times even when you don't feel like it, can help with emotional eating too. When your body knows it will be fed consistently, the urgent, chaotic quality of emotional eating episodes often softens.

Most people use food for comfort sometimes, and that is normal human behaviour. The problem isn't occasional comfort eating, but it is when food becomes the only way to cope with difficult emotions, because you don't have other strategies that feel accessible or effective.

Moving Forward

What I have shared here are starting points that work for many of my clients, but you might need to adapt them to fit your specific circumstances, preferences, and challenges. Changes in eating patterns, whether be it restriction, overeating, or both, reflect what is happening with your mental health. If you find that eating difficulties persist despite trying these strategies, or if you notice significant unintended weight changes in either direction, it may be helpful to discuss this with both a mental health professional and your doctor. Sometimes, eating difficulties signal that your depression, anxiety or burnout needs additional support through therapy, medication adjustments, or both.

If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, or burnout and would like support in developing sustainable self-care practices, I offer counselling and therapy services. Our counselling services in the East side of Singapore offer a safe, non-judgmental space where you can explore your thoughts and feelings with a qualified therapist, with flexible scheduling options to fit your hectic lifestyle. Taking care of your mental well-being is one of the most important investments you can make in yourself.

Stella Ong is a clinical member and registered counsellor with the Singapore Association for Counselling, registration number (C0940). Click here for more information on Stella Ong.

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References

Adriaanse, M. A., de Ridder, D. T. D., & Evers, C. (2011). Emotional eating: Eating when emotional or emotional about eating? Psychology and Health, 26(1), 23–39. https://doi.org/10.1080/08870440903207627

Bongers, P., & Jansen, A. (2016). Emotional eating is not what you think it is and emotional eating scales do not measure what you think they measure. Frontiers in Psychology, 7,1932. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.01932

Ioakimidis, I., Zandian, M., Ulbl, F., Bergh, C., Leon, M., & Sodersten, P. (2011). How eating affects mood. Physiology & Behavior, 103(3–4), 290–294. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.physbeh.2011.01.025